the resigned gamer, everything I hate about the thing I love the most

Jeanne D'arc: Crazy bitches will only let you down

Posted by Sir Cucumber at 12:30 PM on Monday, November 19, 2007

jeanne d'arc, meh, the resigned gamer...yes, meh.

Loopy tart was so hot in armor but after wining and dining her I'm afraid she went limp. (her. not me.) I started flagging about 3/5 of the way through but saw it through to the end. Never did get hard again. (Her. not me.)

Oh sure the old toasted marshmallow and I had some good times- like when she thought god was talking to her or convinced me she was dead, but relationships require growth from both parties and eventually it seemed she just wasn't trying anymore.

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Look, I know it's nice to keep things simple by making 100 EXP = one level up every time. I get that. And I know Jeanne isn't the first liberal mollycoddler to indulge experience points for inflicting a flesh wound on an enemy or healing yourself, but come on. Where's the EXP AWARD = EXP AWARD/CHARACTER LEVEL modifier? If I can't start leveling slower why can't my enemies start leveling faster? It's cool for characters to be chemically imbalanced, but when it comes to the game itself a little Stoichiometry is in order.

Cause I tried- I really tried- to keep the spice in our romance. I never ran around behind your back for any "free battles." I even gave up drinking...augmentative potions...But when I'd turn off the lights, climb into bed and pull you close it was like you weren't even there.

Friends and family clucked over our troubles, "In this stage, at your age, it should be easy. The hard part comes later."

And oh how I longed for the hard part!

But later, and later, and 24 hours and 33 minutes later, still you wouldn't commit. We fought about it but you'd just roll over. Let me win, like you didn't care.

So now I'm back at the blackboard, a free radical. Time may build new bonds, but it won't answer the question I fear I'll never figure out:

At the core of every RPG is a numbers game. So why can't any do the math?

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