the resigned gamer, everything I hate about the thing I love the most

Haiku for life's little lubricants

Posted by Sir Cucumber at 8:43 AM on Friday, April 11, 2008

O HAI KOTAKUITES! U CLICKZ 4 MOAR HAIKUZ!!!...also feedz

video game haiku from the resigned gamer

Love, like butter, makes life easier to swallow, and is best softened and spread around. It also goes good with corn on the cob. It can be sweetened, salty, or reconstituted with herbs and fruity bits. But consumed in too great a quantity, or after the expiration date, it can make you sick. Nevertheless we must not be afraid to fill our stomachs with all kinds- have you ever tasted any butter you didn’t like?


This week’s haiku goes out to all who love and allow themselves to be loved.

DISASTER REPORT

blonde talked too much
traded her for a redhead
she, too, was a prude


BULLY

no one understands
but i don't care what they think
have some chocolate

i'm so low on health
i'd even make out with you
see? i brought flowers.

hard exterior
but his antics hide the truth
big nelly bottom




MAPPY-LAND

low self-esteem mouse
works his fingers to the bone
never gets bonus

all his friends warned him
but they don't come around now
wish cat would catch her



WALL STREET KID

lecherous pest cooch
i will not buy you a dog
how you like me now?



And I don't think this dude plays video games- I don't think he even had a TV,
but Josh Ritter knows a little something about butter. Take a listen:



For more on life lubricants, please see Big John the Lumberjack.