the resigned gamer, everything I hate about the thing I love the most

Dead Rising: Too sexy for your zombies

Posted by Sir Cucumber at 8:34 AM on Monday, May 19, 2008

sir cucumber's bitter corner, the resigned gamer

I don’t do well on deadline. And it’s not that I blow them- it’s because I’m compulsively early. The prick who dropped his final exam on the desk in a half hour and walked out, the jerk two cubicles over who always beats you to work, the tweak sitting alone at the bar without a drink constantly checking his Treo every two minutes after the top of the hour- I’m that guy.

So put me in a richly easter egg-laden sandbox with time-sensitive missions and I’m not gonna come out with much sand in my shoes.

But I’m also a reporter. It runs in my blood. So, after getting confirmation from three FAQ sources, I reconciled my neurosis with the story’s need for local color:

The amount of non case-related people you rescue has no affect on the plot or ending, and you earn experience points up front for simply convincing them to follow you. So, unless they could be carried on my back, I promised salvation, handed over something heavy to swing, and left them for dead.

I used the time saved to discover these outstanding outfits!

And after a hard day of shopping, I was still able to show up for plot-relevant scoops with time to spare!

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